Here's a free 1 year subscription to SYNC Magazine... in my opinion the best magazine out.. but what do I know? See for yourself...
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28 comments:
I agree, this magazine has enough material for me to droll over and masturbate with at the same time.
Too bad I already have a free subscription, two is way better than one!
Karl roxorz my b0xorz.
(and my penis)
When you're a kid, there are always a few things that remain constant. There's a cranky old neighbor who's lawn you don't go near, there's a crazy guy in the neighborhood who keeps pigeons, There's a canal somewhere near your house you try to go fishing in, and somewhere near by, there's a hill nicknamed Devils Hill. There was no exception to this in my childhood neighborhood. As a 4 year old during the 80's, I was free to roam around the neighborhood and do as I wanted, as long as I ran home for dinner. One day, I decided that I needed to ride my bigwheels down Devils hill.
http://img97.exs.cx/img97/4230/bigwheelz4th.jpg
So, I jumped on my bigwheels, and cruised on over to devils hill. As I reached the base, I set up my battle plan. I would ride my bike up the left side of the street, cross over the sidewalk at the end of the circle, and cruise down at 347 miles per hour on the right side. I began my ascent up devils hill about 20 feet into the climb, I jumped off my bigwheels, and began pushing it up the hill. The remaining 200 feet was a laborious climb to the summit.
Upon reaching the pinnacle of Devils hill, I crossed over to the other side of the street, and carefully sat down in my big wheels. As I placed my first foot on the pedal, the bike began to move. I lifted my other foot just in time for the front wheel to begin accelerating. about 5 feet into this drop, my other foot kicked off of the pedal, leaving me with zero feet on the pedals. At this point, I was uncontrollably accelerating down the side of Devils Hill, and figured I had better try to do something about this. Since I'd never even heard of physics, I first tried putting my feet back on the pedals, only to learn that when they're flying that fast, they hurt your feet. First course of action is a failure, but I can still put my feet down. So, I drop my feet onto the concrete, and begin applying pressure. Of course, being a warm spring day in Utah, I am barefoot, and rapidly my feet begin to heat up. So, I lift them, and hang on for the ride. some point after reaching the bottom, I slow enough to drop my feet and stop. I looked back at Devils hill, and vowed I'd never do anything that stupid again.
So 2 years later, I got a bicycle, and spotted the hill while I was riding around. On a bigwheels, I had only managed I dunno, 136 MPH, which was a great disappointment to me when the goal was no less than 347 MPH. So, I started riding my bike to the top of the hill. About 20 feet up it, I jumped off, and began pushing my bike up the hill. Reaching the summit, I climbed onto my bike, locked the handbrake, and pointed the front wheel towards the bottom of the hill. Releasing the brake, I was off. Flying down the middle of the street, I began to take inventory of the situation, as the wind began to superheat the surface of my skin with it's intense speed. On the one side of the equation, I could die if a car decided to back out of a driveway, or if someone turned onto the street... On the other hand, I had to be going at least 200 miles per hour, and had better keep an eye out for cops. As I neared the bottom, my worst fears materialized in the form of a beat up station wagon.
This heap of rust that pulled out of a side street looked like a wall of tetanus coated death, waiting for me to slam into it. Using my razor sharp wits, I deployed my brakes, locking the rear wheel into one of the worlds most awesome skids. I managed to avoid death by a mere 150 feet and decided this attempt would go in the “mulligan” pile, and a do-over was necessary in order to properly experience the power of Devils hill. So, I diligently rode/pushed my bike to the top of the hill again, and prepared for my deathly drop of doom. Once again, I flew down the hill with visions of the space shuttle burning up on re-entry flooding my mind, warily passed the side street the station wagon had pulled out of, and continued clear down to Churchwood street.
http://img97.exs.cx/img97/573/devilshill2ct.jpg
Epilogue:
A year after defeating Devils Hill for the first time on a bike, I ended up moving to Arizona, where the steepest hill near me, was a slight hill by the school, where a Natural Gas pipeline went through, and they couldn’t grade the whole street completely flat. This was of course until I discovered the joy, the triumph, and the insanity of downhill mountain biking in high school.
This is definitely a great magazine.. If you don't get it, start subscribing.. Plus It's free!
signed up for mine the last time Arl had it up, and lo and behold, it never came. I'll try again
hahaha. yeah man! MysteryPointlessStory guy, u should start up ur own blog and stop posting here. it's not that i'm annoyed (yet anyways) but because of u, it takes way too long (half a second more) to scroll down to comment while reading other peoples posts and skipping urs (most of the time, unless ur post looks short enough). thanks man. and get the fuck out of here :P. i know u only have the best intentions to spread the joy ur pointless stories possibly bring (hopefully) and i'm not telling u to stop writing these things. it's just that u should post this stuff on ur own blog or stop copy and pasting this crap in the comments section.
Joshua
Well I have signed up to free offers before , sometimes they come and sometimes they dont.
Today I had 2 issues of Maxim in the mailbox , July and August and the July issue said June 2008 expires and the August issue said June 2010 it expires , so apparently these do work if someone doesnt catch it.
Thanks for the magazine links Karl , and they will make MONEY anyway , in the form of ads because of the added eyes that are viewing it , so who cares :) sign up. You never know what might happen :)
Chuck
Wow, Tim you're the coolest guy I've ever met!
I like to poop turtle heads
Jeepers! Tim's blog is so neat! I like him a whole lot! He seems awesomely cool! Well actually no, he sucks the hard long one. But that's what you get when you're a douche and put yourself out in public on a much superior blog.
VIVA LA KARL!
Tim = PWNED.
Tim = P00ped
Hey guyz leave tim alone okaaay?? whut did he due to youu?he is like my fav bloger so dun diss him kthxbye
p.s. love u tim <3
-tiki
All your butt plugs are belong to Tim Taylor's anus.
hey karl this blog rox
cya :)
Oh god! You have to bring me into tim's fight... Dumbass!
It's not so much "Tim's fight" as it is, "random people who read his gay ass blog and attacked him while he didn't fight back..... fight" Plenty o' folks comment on this site and leave links to thier blogs. Tim's glaring gayness compiled with his unfunny and untalented writing style led to this flaming. No one else has been flamed, mainly because thier shit was OK. I blame Tim for sucking.
Wow.. I have no idea why the hell you guys jumped on me and I'm sure you'll jump on me again for this..
First of all, i never claimed I have a better blog then karl because obviously I don't. This blog is awesome.
I was just saying that I used one of these links from Karls site and now I get a ton of free subscriptions because someone said they saigned up and got nothing.
I do agree with you that I write like shit.. If you had the time to read any of the crap i ever write about you'll see it mentioned a shitload of times how bad of a writer I am.
It's not that I'm a terrible writer, I just don't give a shit and I never edit my posts before I publish them..
Tim loses badly. Not only does he delete his own comment ffrom this site, but he deletes all the army or karl's posts on his own site as well and THEN admits he sucks.
Goeth fans of Karl and celebrate! We hath struck victory!
Of course I was owned.. Last time I say I got a bunch of free magazines and I like a site.. I do by the way, Karl, this site is awesome.
I know when to pick my battles.. Me vs the internet isn't one I want to be in..
Yeah Tim! We were just playin wit ya. You didn't have to go and change your URL and go into the "blogger relocation" program.
HAHAA TIM got ass reamed!
yay for the internets!
Hey, I didn't want a 1000 comments a day on my blog tormenting me.. I know my blog sucks ass, all it is is a way to keep in touch with my friends since we're all stretched out across the country (and world).
Talk about being a faceless bitch, why don't you put your pic up, pillsbury doughboy? And no, I'm not talking about chopping it up to hide your ugly features either.
Pudgeman, here's an idea: Go back to wanking off and quit spamming to promote your crappy blog.
Wait a minute, I see the Pud guy's face. Anonymous above me makes no sense. He posted as himself, more than most can say. Plus, the Tim guy never even talked shit. Why would you attack him?
Also, anonymous above me, you used the work "wanking." Shut the fuck you you shitfaced Brit. America owns you!
USA! USA! USA!
tims blog is fine... stop being stupid.
everyone talking shit can post their site/blog and we'll compare ..then talk.
Hey anon69 why don't you get off pudge's dick?
If you're looking to suck someone off, it should be Karl's cock since your posting on his blog.
You people are fucking morons. Listen to Karl and quit with the flaming of random people. Hey Karl, why not disable anonymous posting and cut off these morons? They have a free for all right now.
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